Emily Oehler, Author at Golden Acorns

My Angel, Sparkle Weathered by Life

Posted on December 4, 2021December 4, 2021 by Emily OehlerLeave a Comment

As a preacher’s kid (and now also a preacher’s sister) angels have always been a part of my life. First the angel choir with white robes and tinsel halos. Later with my line in in the church play, “The Best Christmas Pageant Ever,” as an ornery kid playing an angel in the school’s pageant assertively commanding: “For unto you a child is born!” wearing pink Chuck Taylor Converse high tops. Oh so many church hymns with angel references such as “Angels We Have Heard on High.” Then each 5:30pm Christmas Eve service, my dad pulled a chair down from the pulpit, welcomed all the wiggly kids, and read a children’s story, often from Katherine Paterson’s “Angles and Other Strangers.”

As a kid the angels always seemed to glow, sparkle, and be jubilant. A mix of magic, wonder, and joy. As a grown up, I’ve found a better angelic image: The nearly 60 year old angel that sits on top of my parent’s tree that has a remarkable semblance to Phyllis Dillard. This angel perches atop the tree always a bit askew – sometimes looking like she rushed into position and other times as if she had one to many mimosas. Her blond hair with that fresh just rolled out of bed style. She has stains on her robe… I’m guessing chocolate. She is missing a hand and her wings have a permanent tilt from I think, flying around in circles with a crazy Christmas “to do” list.

Why this angel? She is an authentic angel. My angel represents my kind of faith – sparkle weathered by life. My angel reflects faith in action rather than faith perfected. My angel is relatable rather than pristine. My angel is joyful yet puts someone as ease; there is no need for pomp and circumstance with her. A simple “come as you are and join me” faith.

As I look at my angel, David LaMotte’s song “We Are Each Other’s Angels” fades in and out of my head like a mediation…

Well I hope I see you later
‘Cause it’s time for me to go
Someone just pulled over
Sure was good to know you
Go answer your calling
Go and fill somebody’s cup
And if you see an angel falling
Won’t you stop and help them up

‘Cause we are each other’s angels
And we meet when it is time
We keep each other going
And we show each other signs

Sometimes you will stumble
Sometimes you might fall down
Sometimes you will get lonely
With all these people around
You might shiver when the wind blows
And you might get blown away
You might even lose your colors
But don’t you ever lose your faith

We are each other’s angels
And we meet when it is time
We keep each other going
And we show each other signs

Thank you for the water
I thought I was gonna die out here in the desert
But you quenched my thirst
Let’s break a little bread together
I’ve got a little manna
It was a gift
From somebody who was passing by
And offered me a lift
Now go answer your calling
Go and fill somebody’s cup
And if you see an angel falling
Won’t you stop and help them up

We are each other’s angels
And we meet when it is time
We keep each other going
And we show each other signs

With all that makes up the holiday season, I hope you pause to appreciate your angel and be mindful about how you can be one to others.

November 2021 Quote – “Broken Crayons Still Color”

Posted on November 29, 2021November 29, 2021 by Emily Oehler1 Comment

As I set up my calendar for the month, I select a quote I’ve found that speaks to me. I write it in my planner and leave space below it to capture phrases I hear or read that speak to me and relate to the quote. I found this practice centers me for the month, and helps me be more present in my conversations, meetings, and readings. For November 2021, the quote was “Broken crayons still color.”

As a kid, the 64-count crayon box with the sharpener in the back was the ultimate. The precise points. The colors. The endless artistic possibilities. It was all about the variety.

Inevitably over time favorite crayons got worn down. The paper was ripped down for sharpening. And eventually, snap!, a break. Over time the pristine set would look rather worn out. A hodgepodge of points, partially wrapped nubs, and naked bits. As I thought about the crayons, I remembered the feeling of wanting to replace the colorful nubs with pristine new ones as if they colored better.

Quotes I wrote down throughout the month included:

“It comes from the inside out”
“Anti-fragile”
“Dedication to finding happiness every damn day”
“People inspire people and become part of their DNA”
“Make a clearing in the dense forest of your life and wait patiently”
“Micro-affirmation”
“In a world of Barbies, everyone needs a Joan Jett”
“Spark energy”
“Frientor – friend + mentor”
“The celebration of personal expression”
“Love defies all science and reason”
“Systematize serendipity”
“Constantly seek adventure and magic”
“A truth was unlocked in me and I couldn’t wait to live it out”
“The punctuation of one’s truth”
“Courage to reveal your true voice”

As I reviewed the quotes I jotted down throughout November, what stood out was the focus on people and having the space to be ourselves in a joyful way.

As I think about the people in my life who mean the most – from family and friends to close teammates and mentors, it’s those who display the wear and tear of life that I gravitate to. Those who expose their torn wrappers and broken bits. Those who are authentic and own all of who they are – and what it took to get where they are and who they are.

Yet for so long at work, I tried to be the pristine crayon. My wrapper a black suit and sensible pumps. But over time, the energy to appear “put together” kept me detached. Detached as a leader setting a false expectation for my team of what was needed to succeed. Detached from my clients due to my internal pressure to show I had all the answers. Detached from deeper relationships as I hid my torn wrapper. Detached from who I was at the core.

I think these quotes also reinforced my personal and professional work centered on diversity, equity, and inclusion. Reading Ijeoma Oluo’s “So You Want to Talk About Race” and Arthur Wood’s “Hiring for Diversity: The Guide to Building an Inclusive and Equitable Organization” this month reminded me how I felt bound up focused on my wrapper and challenged my habitual thinking/actions that prevented others from making their mark. For me, it means pausing to ask: Am I acting/thinking on auto pilot? How can I encourage individuality? Who else can I invite? Are my words welcoming? Do my actions align to my intent? What am I overlooking due to my color and background? The authors made it clear just how much better we are together when we have variety.

My journey to be more accepting of myself and others has been colorful. I quit a fast-track job. I defined and redefined boundaries. I put vulnerability ahead of image. I said “yes, and” more. I screwed up, owned it, and learned. I won awards and lost big deals. I danced at team parties. I said no. I sent thank you notes. I took medical leave twice. I shared my power with others. I asked questions – a lot of questions. I knitted. Basically, I surrounded myself with others who were also vibrantly tattered building a compassionate network… and together we helped change the world. Seriously.

But most importantly, before I could do all of that, I first accepted my path wasn’t the “standard” way and proceeded forward with more bounce in my step coloring outside of the lines.

An Eight Hour Conversation in Silence

Posted on November 22, 2021November 22, 2021 by Emily Oehler1 Comment

I spent the last eight hours sharing more than 1 million words. The words came and went. Some in an emotional onslaught. Others dripped slow like molasses. The words reverberated, some boomeranging back again and again and again. Some I wanted more of, and others I wished to escape.

For eight hours in silence, I shared more than 1 million words to myself during a Mindfulness Based Stress Reduction retreat. The experience left me calm in some ways and spent in others. Eight hours with only your own words to listen to is daunting, even for me – an introvert – who’s comfortable spending time alone.

Each new practice of the day reinforced just how many “mind habits” I have … those loops that play on repeat in my head or rear their ugly head at the most in opportune time. While some habits are good: I carry with me a strong sense of love and community. Other mind habits are distracting and sometimes detrimental: The little nag that whispers not enough, not yet, not you.

This retreat, part of an eight-week training, emersed me in a variety of mindful practices all geared to help me recognize, be curious about, and move around my mind habits. During the day I:

Did seated breathing meditation
Conducted a body scan lying down
Held various yoga poses
Walked mindfully outside
Sat and ate in silence centered on my food

As our class practiced together via Zoom, our instructor stated that throughout the day we’d have “visitors,” and when they arrived simply name them, breathe, and let them move on. He shared that each visitor was an opportunity for something to work better rather than be an obstacle. Visitors could feel like a challenge but when embraced with a state of curiosity (Why are you popping up? What can I learn from you? Why are you back?), could be help us grow, reframe our thinking, and forge a new mind habit. I appreciated the metaphor of a challenge being a visitor – a neutral, if not positive word. I also liked that once we learn from our visitor it leaves. It’s not a permanent relationship. We have power over the visitor, and can help them leave.

Additionally, I participated in a few guided meditations. My favorite being “unconditional friendliness.” We were instructed to mentally focus on four specific phrases first thinking about myself, then a friend, then a “neutral” person (someone in the world less connected to you like a neighbor, co-worker, teacher, bus driver, or bartender at your favorite hangout). The four phrases:

May you be safe.
May you be happy and peaceful.
May you be healthy and strong.
May you live with ease and joy.

For about twenty minutes I focused on these four phrases. I thought of people in my life mentally stating: May you be safe. May you be happy and peaceful. May you be healthy and strong. May you live with ease and joy. Then I repeated the phrases to myself: May I be safe. May I be happy and peaceful. May I be healthy and strong. May I live with ease and joy.

While I don’t have many negative messages in my head, I can’t say have a lot of “pro-love” ones either. I do not typically take time out to mentally love or reassure myself. I don’t regularly hear a soundtrack of compassion play in my head, yet I try to give that to others. It was a meaningful experience to give myself such concentrated positive energy. These well wishes for myself remined me of a meme I saw few weeks ago stating we should talk to ourselves with the same way we do to our pets.

Throughout my day of silent mindful meditation, the words in my head came and went. What began like crashing phrases eased into a gentle ebb and flow with longer breathing spaces of silence between them… followed by a lightened mental load.

Move Toward Your Dreams with One Step

Posted on November 9, 2021November 9, 2021 by Emily OehlerLeave a Comment

We all have something that we want to do. We carry these acorns in a safe space protecting them from the light of day, from getting scorched by the sun of other’s disbelief or even our own doubts. If we do nothing the dream is “safe.” While it might be protected, the dream deferred can also, in Langston Hughes’ words, “dry up like a raisin in the sun” or over time “just sags like a heavy load.”

It can be scary and exhilarating to start something new. Any action puts you on a path of change, which will cause a ripple effect for more change. It’s overwhelming, exciting, and daunting to move forward. And that’s exactly the direction change propels you: forward.

Many years ago, one of my hidden secrets was to run a marathon. Did I run? No. Had I ever run? No. Did I like to run (thinking back to high school’s presidential fitness tests)? No. Did I know how to run? No. Did I know how to train to run long distance, or short distance for that matter? No. Did I know how to “fuel” (eat/hydrate) to run? No. Did I have the attire to run? No. But yet, I wanted to run a marathon.

Regardless of the goal, each one requires a first step. One action. For me, it was run 1 block. Done. I made it. Then on to the next step. Each step, each action slowly generated another action such as:

Practice getting up at 6am to run (but not running)
Get up at 6am and run
Run a block, walk a block, run a block model
Commit to some duration of running such as 3 times a week
Tell one friend who’d finished a marathon who gave me her training program, signed me up for my first race – a 5K, and agreed to run with me
Buy properly fitted running shoes thanks to Pacer’s Running
Purchase Under Armour cold weather gear
Read a book on how to prepare to run a marathon
Get more sleep
Get a Reiki treatment for a nagging issue I’d carried in my body since 5^th grade
Discover hill repeats
Find out gummy worms were my boost of choice on long distances

As I let more sun in on my dream, I could more easily see it come true. Each step also brought more help from my family and friends, plus coworkers who watched me online during a staff meeting as my tracking chip showed my mile marker progress on race day.

Each single action led me to another single action. Cumulatively each step led me from 2 mile to 5 miles to 10 miles to 18 miles, and yes, to finish 26.2 miles. Cumulatively each step gave me confidence. Cumulatively, each step confirmed I could overcome the inevitable setbacks. Cumulatively, I became a runner.

What’s your first step?

October 2021 Quote – “So Wonder Can Breathe”

Posted on November 1, 2021November 1, 2021 by Emily OehlerLeave a Comment

As I set up my calendar for the month, I select a quote I’ve found that speaks to me. I write it in my planner and leave space below it to capture phrases I hear or read that speak to me and relate to the quote. I found this practice centers me for the month, and helps me be more present in my conversations, meetings, and readings. For October 2021, the quote was “Leave a few cracks in your knowledge so wonder can breathe.”

This quote found me after I made wonder a priority. You see, in the masterclass I’m in we had an exercise to identify an emotion we’d like more of in our life. After much list making of words and discernment, I chose wonder. For me wonder represents a curiosity, a child-like delight, a sense of magic. I equate it a bit to the Lost Boys – the older we get the less wonder we have. Our experience, preconceived notions, and habits take over. While the adult lens might make things more efficient, it can dull the senses.

Some of the phrases I collected over the 31 days of October include:

Tell me, what is it you plan to do with your one wild and precious life?
Explore habits of the mind
I still believe in the light and what it makes of us
Act in your possibility
Generous authority
I knew there was a way but I didn’t know the way
The great turnaround
I see you; I am here
The difference between fact and thought
We don’t see the world as it is but rather as we are
What stories are you writing and rewriting in your head because of false beliefs?
Humor and awe
The gift of boredom is a luxury
Close the gap between our intent and our impact
I can only learn if I avail myself to others
Make purpose your bouncer
Wake up to your life

Wonder helped me get more comfortable with not having the answer. Wondered helped me be more open to possibility. Wonder caused me to ask better questions. Wonder had me invite new people to the conversation. Wonder enabled me to take time in meetings to connect more with attendees. Wonder helped me be more playful.

In addition to seeking wonder as a state, I also used the word as a prompt. Rather than take an action on auto pilot or make an assumption based on history, I paused and asked “I wonder if…?” This simple question opened up my thinking, enabled me put down baggage that blocked my view, let me step toward more fun, reduce my worry. Each time I stepped into a space of wonder I was rewarded.

And as if to thank me for focusing on wonder, my month ended with a day of wonderment. My 50^th birthday that was filled with a surprise visit of seven out-of-town friends. I ignored my watch for the day. I sang out loud to Prince. I ordered all the pizza and ate all the cake. I didn’t monitor my emotions – from tears to crying laughter. I fully listened without worrying about a response. I danced on a stripper pole in the party van. I made a wonderful wish.

I appreciate the permission this quote gave me to embrace my imagination and step into a state of playful wonder… and hope you take time to wonder what this quote means to you.

Smudge and Fig Preserves, the Cultural Connection at Work

Posted on October 28, 2021October 28, 2021 by Emily OehlerLeave a Comment

As a consultant with a strong undercurrent of Type A, I find great satisfaction in “the do.” Checklists checked, calls completed, emails sent/deleted, deliverables submitted. Done is a delightful feeling.

However, over the 1.5 years of COVID-crazy I felt like my focus on done became all consuming. As if the more I did would make me feel better; but it didn’t. The satisfaction of complete became the burden of more. More, more, more. I lost sight of the why and missed the joy of the being – especially from the energy of team collaboration. The remote environment seemed to have restricted the connectional side of work in many ways.

Upon this realization, I became deliberate in how I began my latest project which included a partnership with a Native American small business. I wanted to focus on the why, be smart about how we used our time together, and be culturally sensitive. I wanted to put connection front and center of the work.

You see our team’s diversity was significant – DC “beltway bandits,” some PhDs, and Tribal members all working to improve health care for American Indians/Alaska Natives. To support this, we received historical training, word sensitivity workshops, and candid first-hand accounts of cultural nuances. The emersion was great and terrifying. The more I knew, the more I realized there was so much I didn’t know or understand. My lens to life was different. And while that difference is OK – my life is my life – I began to realize how many blind spots I had that could impact the effectiveness of my work. More than anything I didn’t want to produce anything that would offend or do harm to the initiative. For a while I pulled back into listen mode, a bit afraid. Then I found some courage to take steps to move forward and learn. I did this to get more comfortable so that I could really apply my expertise in an appropriate and impactful way. My sitting on the sidelines did not help the cause.

I started by privately connecting with a woman on the project to better understand something done during our weekly team meeting – smudging. At the end of our meetings, her husband would bless us while fanning a giant bird feather over burning, smoking dried plants. He always began with “Grandfather spirit.” The blessing was less prayer and more a setting of intention. A request that the spirit help us be true to our word and compassionate in our actions as we served the community in our work. To be vividly aware of the world and space in which we work. The centering practice provided a calming way to anchor us to our work and take a moment to breathe together as a team before we scattered our separate ways onto another Teams call. My teammate Anna answered my questions and in doing so created a safe space for me to ask and learn more.

The website Indigenous Corporate Training states, “Smudging is traditionally a ceremony for purifying or cleansing the soul of negative thoughts of a person or place. There are four elements involved in a smudge:

The container, traditionally a shell representing water, is the first element.
The four sacred plants (cedar, sage, sweetgrass, tobacco), gifts from mother earth, represent the second element.
The fire produced from lighting the sacred plants represents the third element.
The smoke produced from the fire represents air, the fourth element.”

Fast forward a few months, and Anna learned my mother had open heart surgery. She mailed me four types of smudge to support her recovery: sweet grass braid, golden sage, traditional sage, and pine picked from her yard. In turn, I sent back a jar of homemade fig preserves that I made with my mother, from figs picked from her yard. Homemade food, a southern tradition, to show love and provide comfort.

This is the real “do” that matters in work. The forging of relationships, the learning, the collaboration, the connection – all of which makes the work better and the journey richer.

A Prayer for Q

Posted on October 28, 2021October 28, 2021 by Emily OehlerLeave a Comment

Prayer request for those so inclined…. prayer for a coworker turned bestie who I’ll refer to a Q.

God,

You made us all in your image. As I think of it, some magical piece of each of us is you… height, humor, stubbornness, laugh, resilience, allergies. At our center (much like a Tootsie pop) is the piece of your goodness. We might not see, appreciate, understand, or want what we have — especially when what makes us special in your eyes, isn’t in others.

This acceptance of our full, unique self is complicated. We carry expectations (ours and others), doubts, bravado, fear, hope, desires, and dreams about who we are…. and then there’s who we want to be. Continuing to grow into your image can be lonely, scary, and breathtaking. But when we move closer, comfort abounds.

For Q, help us emit a wave of reinforcement for the person she is stepping into through much hard work, reframed boundaries, self acceptance, and faith. Continue to replenish her joy as the world rubs against her, seemingly testing her as she fortifies her sea legs. Provide touch points of reassurance on her path. And, as she casts her new light, like a freshly painted lighthouse, may it lead healthy accepting love back to her. Help Q see, feel, and own all the magic and wonder that is her.

Finally, we are grateful to you for making her. And celebrate the diversity of your image among us.

Amen

Leadership: Understand & Articulate Your Boundaries

Posted on October 17, 2021October 17, 2021 by Emily OehlerLeave a Comment

I have a standing “girls chat” with a co-worker each month. It’s a time when we open up our professional closet and haul out our dirty laundry and miscellaneous items we don’t know what to do with but can’t let go of. There is a lot of validation, active listening, hard questions, and resource swapping – from articles to people in our network – that occurs in our chats. These chats aren’t about solutions or fixing the other person, but rather the camaraderie of two travelers on a career journey. While the information is helpful and the laughter is great, it’s the companionship that offers a soothing balm that keeps me coming back.

Boundary Types

Over the past few months many of our conversations ended up touching on boundaries. In a summer chat, she mentioned buying the book Set Boundaries, Find Peace: A Guide to Reclaiming Yourself. Candidly, I’ve never thought I had an issue with boundaries. In fact, my family and friends will tell you I’m pretty stubborn, that I know my limits/needs, and I’m not one to “convince” into something. However, when I investigated the book, I noted that it covered six types of boundaries:

Physical
Sexual
Intellectual
Emotional
Material
Time

I’d never thought in terms of “types” of boundaries—just that you had them, or you didn’t. The book offered “tips on how to uphold personal limits” and this terms gave me pause for how I think of boundaries. The author, Nedra Tawwab, writes, “But what do ‘healthy boundaries’ really mean—and how can we successfully express our needs, say ‘no,’ and be assertive without offending others?”

As I thought about what the book had to offer, my girls chat discussions, and my shallow understanding of boundaries, I quickly added the book to my Audible library. (Note: if a book’s not your thing, check out her blog which is filled with one-page nuggets of insight.)

Set Boundaries, Find Peace: A Guide to Reclaiming Yourself helped me better understand the complexities around boundaries. That my boundaries can be solid, Jello, or missing all together depending on the area. I also realized that what I use to define as wants/needs – which I could dismiss if they were broken by others – should be rethought of as a more formal boundary. I appreciate that Nedra gives readers examples of how take a concept (or need) and convert it into a clearly articulated boundary statement. There is tremendous power is being able to state a boundary and define what is essential for you to be the best you.

Listen for Boundaries

Additionally, listening to her state various types of boundary examples in each chapter helped me be a better boundary listener. Hearing her state them, helped me more easily hear when someone is setting one with me. In fact, not long after finishing the book, I went to get a pedicure. I was in a new spa and just as the massage began a patron walked over to the woman next to me and began a loud, on-going conversation through her mask. After a while, I asked staff to stay something but they were unsuccessful. So, I did with an “excuse me, but you’re really loud” comment. The woman immediately stopped and walked out. The following day, the spa owner texted me to ask that I not come back based on the incident. She explained that her business was not a spa but a social environment, and she stood up for her customers who wanted that experience. She shared the boundary of her business. In listening to her, I reflected on how I missed defining my own need as a choose a spa to try: a relaxing quite pedicure to unwind from weeks of work Zoom calls and treat my runner’s toes. I also realized that when I spoke to the patron I didn’t express myself well but rather made it about her, which wasn’t fair. Rather than feel attacked (a likely pre-book response), I thanked the owner for clarifying the boundaries of her business. I also told her if I knew folks who wanted a social spa I’d refer them. I didn’t want her worried I’d be a vindictive customer. We ended on positive terms with boundary clarity.

Here’s to our improved ability to claim, communicate, and support boundaries – ours and others.

Be Brave, Leadership Communications Depends on It

Posted on October 11, 2021October 11, 2021 by Emily OehlerLeave a Comment

The Junior League of Northern Virginia recently asked me to conduct a training on leadership communications during change. No small ask, as “The League” is a global organization that generates community change through the effective action and leadership of trained volunteers who promote voluntarism and develop the potential of women. Members are constantly on their A-game, to say the least – leading careers, leading families, leading boards, leading programs.

As I worked on my presentation, I thought about my communications work that helped leaders implement national changes. Reached 100 million Americans to help increase patient awareness of UFE, a non-surgical treatment for uterine fibroids. Increased access to care for rural Veterans by 240% in five years. Facilitated the employment of 60,000 military spouse hires – meeting the White House goal two years ahead of schedule. Increased combat wounded soldiers’ knowledge of an Army program’s services by 35.1% in one year.

I glanced at some of the books on my shelf: Lead from Outside, The Art of Possibility, Missing Conversations, The Leadership Challenge, You Are Your Best Thing, The Third Door, Resonate Leadership, The Five Levels of Attraction, Change Management, Switch, and Change Better. The books on change are endless… and it seems like you barely finish one book before the approach to change itself has changed.

I realized the success of leadership communications to drive a change comes down to a few simple things:

A vivid, simple, clearly articulated vision of how the change makes a difference for people in and out of the organization.
A consistent, frequent, repeatable approach to sharing information on the change that is centered on the people in the change (not the organization).
- A litmus test for this is to ask yourself how does your communications help people: understand the change, believe in the change, internalize the change, prepare for the change, see success, try the change, advocate for the change, elevate issues, see the work change, and be the change?
Active listening to those who must walk into the change—as a builder (employee), as a partner, and a customer—and tangibly show them how you applied their feedback to address their perspective and needs.
Publicly using data to show what is working in terms of people walking into the change (behaviors and outcomes) and what isn’t, in order to modify the approach.
An engaged leader who devotes time, resources, energy, and emotion to the cause, over and over and over and over and over again to bring people into new possibilities, new thinking, new solutions, new actions, and new outcomes. They bring people with them, find new people to join them, and celebrates people along the journey.

But leadership communications in a change is not just about the CEO, SES federal leader, military Commander, or division manager. Leadership communications is at every level. It’s as much about a mindset as the words shared. Successful leadership communications is about bravery.

Bravery to bring voice to the unseen.

Bravery to acknowledge mistakes publicly and regroup.

Bravery to dig into and share the data with others in order to build better solutions.

Bravery to invite adversaries to the table and find common ground.

Bravery to call upon your peers when you’re beyond your expertise.

Bravery to seek diversity and move beyond the established “leadership team.”

Bravery to let others step in so that you can recharge.

Bravery to stay the course when it gets hard, and it will.

Bravery to be silly to lighten the mood.

Bravery to move beyond the board room and be a public cheerleader.

Bravery to reveal your own challenge with change.

Bravery to show change in action.

Why be brave? Because bravery is where great service to others occurs. As Dr. Rebecca Ray states, “She was never quite ready. But she was brave. And the universe listens to brave.”

Monthly Quote (Sept 2021) – Powerful Quest

Posted on October 11, 2021October 11, 2021 by Emily OehlerLeave a Comment

As I set up my calendar for the month, I select a quote I’ve found that speaks to me. I write it in my planner and leave space below it to capture phrases I hear or read that speak to me and relate to the quote. I found this practice centers me for the month, and helps me be more present in my conversations, meetings, and readings. For September 2021, the quote was “Your quest is powerful. You needn’t apologize for the space it takes.”

I think this quote spoke to me for a variety of reasons. I was coming out of three months being the primary caregiver for both my parents due to my mom’s medical emergency and dad’s advancing dementia. I was stepping back into work after 12-months away. I was focused on my goal to coach and write more. I liked its symbolism of our journey as a quest. That it’s about the search – that we don’t need to have all the answers. There was something I seemed to be looking for, and I liked the endorsement this quote gave me to make my search and growth a priority.

Some of the phrases I collected over the 30 days of September included:

The flame of inquiry
The wound is where light enters you
What mountain will we expect to bow down?
Always work on something uncomfortably exciting
Joy is in the messiness
Provide space and grace
What will build the greatest ripple effect?
There is no way to happiness, happiness is the way
There is so much we can let go of without losing a thing
Boldness has genius, power, and magic in it
Your soul is here to grow

With the month behind me, I think I did well on my quest. I had more personal conversations at work about the shift I felt coming out of my leave. I started a new certification to become a mindfulness facilitator which will serve my career goals and build a habit as a practitioner. I wrote five blogs. I explored volunteering with the American Heart Association. I celebrated 19 years married. I set up a workspace outside where I feel more at peace, and more like me of the me I want to be. I spoke at church on rekindling faith as a caregiver (18 minute mark). I appreciate the permission this quote gave me to more boldly step forward on the quest that is me… and I hope it helps empower you.

Onward!